Wilting Rose
by Do-I-have-a-choice
Summary: What happens when his very first love from High School reappears again? Will Grell's love for him arise once more? Or will it not? And Grell's secret.. Will everyone find out? Or will William open his mouth? AU OOC fanfic featuring Grell x Undertaker. Other pairings may appear.. So be ready for some fluff and of course, SMUT! Wooo! Yaoi fic! No like, no read!
1. Chapter 1

_Hey guys! Guess who wrote a new fanfic?! HAR HAR! MEEEE! Hehe! How are you guys? I missed you all! ^/^_

_Well, here I give you an AU + OOC fanfic… I hope you guys like Grell x Undertaker! XD_

_Enjoy!_

The city lights were bright as always, and traffic noises were loud as usual. The city life was not easy but people managed to get around. Arguments among neighbors were frequent but everyone was use to them. I mean, if you aren't able to live with such noises, then why live in a city as noisy and annoying as New York City? Sooner or later, you will get use to it, and if not then..sucks for you.

My life here is marvelous, I have a prestige career as a model and am currently living in a luxurious hotel with my roommate. He's a great person, both as a man and as a love maker. We aren't dating nor anything of such, yet, he claims me as his almost every night. He's obviously an obsessed moron who's in love with me, but..I only care for the great sex we have and his money.

Yes, you all must be thinking that I'm a gold digger and I'm not going to lie.. Money does interest me, and without money, no body gets around. Admit it, if it weren't for money, you wouldn't have those cellphones or laptops. You wouldn't even had food to feed upon! Money controls the world, and without it, we are nothing.

Well, now that you know that I'm basically a gold digger and a model, let me introduce you to my motives as to why I am how I am today.

As a young man, I wasn't treated nice. I was bullied, beaten up by school students and even my parents. My family was poor and we barely managed to survive. I was blamed for the loss of money, and based on my parents' point of view, I am a disgrace to the Sutcliff household and even the Sutcliff name. My parents frequently told me, no..basically rubbed it in my face that, if I wasn't born their money wouldn't have gone down the drain like it did. I was a workout for them, and I was barely a normal child.

I was a pre-matured child, born with only 7 months in my Mother's stomach. I fought to survive in the first few days of birth, and was born rather differently. Of course, I was smaller than my father's hand. I ignored my mother's breast milk and thank God I did! Just the sheer image of me sucking milk from a woman's breast is disgusting! Ugh!

Anyway, I wasn't the typical child that loving parents would have. I played with dolls instead of toy cars and action figures. I knew there was something wrong with me but, I couldn't understand at the time. I loved to draw princesses in different dresses and skirts; different hair styles and heels. I loved it all but, my parents did not...

..

When school started, my hair was as long as a girl's hair. It went down to my hips and I loved it. I was a beautiful redhead and I was blessed with female characteristics, giving the impression of a normal girl. Boys would ask me for my number and often tried to ask me on dates, but as flirtatious and beautiful as I was back then, I simply denied them. They weren't good enough nor attractive enough for me anyway.

Girls on the other hand, hated me for being gorgeous. I let those haters be my motivators and because of that hate, I became much more beautiful and craveable...

Teachers would hit up on me back in high school and college. Tsk.. Perverts..

And now look at me! I am a beautiful young lady with men drooling for me and fame dragging behind me. I am a sensation worldwide! But it's mostly because of my beauty, not the line of clothes designed by my dearest Aleister. He's my baby and I'll do anything, anything..to gain everything I want. He eats from the palm of my hand as well as other men. Oh~ I'm simply fabulous! Hehe~

..

Ugh. This breeze is bad for my skin, it's best if I-

"..Nn.. Grell.."

Aww. My darling has risen.

"Yes, darling?" I asked softly and seductive, he loves it.

"..Come back here.." he groaned out to me tiredly and I couldn't help but to snicker. His body was wrapped in silky white bed sheets that made his skin a tad more darker. It slid slowly from his broad shoulders and I couldn't help but blush lightly.

"You want another round, dear? I thought you were done for the night.." I teased and I watched him rise into a sitting position. The silky white bed sheets slid down now from his naked torso and he gazed at me with lustful eyes.

Oh.. Those eyes..

"Come here.." he demanded and I stood my ground because I love how angry he tends to get when I don't obey. He sighs through his nostrils and eased from our bed.

"You seriously need to calm that beast of yours. A lady such as I need some rest, you know.." I say as I throw out the window the cigarette I had in between my fingers. I ignore him and turn to close the window to block the cold winter breeze from intruding our warm hotel room. I feel his hand travel up my thigh and up to my hip.

"When I say to come, you come.." he whispers into my ear and I roll my eyes. This moron thinks he has me eating from his hands but, no buddy! Not tonight, not ever.

But, just to calm his erected tits, I turn slowly and press my body against his. "And what are you going to do, Mr. Spears? Fuck me until I bleed, Hm?" I ask in a hush tone as I bite my lower lip. Oh he loves it when I do that, because he licks his lips after I bite my own and he leans closer to me. His eyes starred straight into mine and he thinks I'm melting for him.

"..If that is what you desire. I would fuck you until your whole body goes numb." he replies against my lips and quickly claims them. Oh how I have him trapped within my fish net.

He does think that I'm so in love with him, but in all truth, I don't know how being in love feels like. I don't know how a love letter looks like nor how a gentle kiss tastes like. No man has ever been in love with me, they only craved me at night. I have been men's favorite toys since high school but, that still didn't stop me from getting what I always wanted. A modeling career.

I feel his hands explore my thin body until he gropes my ass, and to just give him an erection, I moan against our kiss and part from it as I stare up at him. "Keep your hands to yourself, Mr. Spears." I say teasefully and watch his expression change. His eyebrows furrow deeply and he gropes my ass harder, I know I will gain bruises from it but, I'll just keep my cool for now.

"I do as I please.. And I want you on our bed, on your hands and knees."

"Oooh~ So demanding. How about..no.." I reply back and shove him off my naked body. I already have enough bruises from him, I don't want to gain more. At least not until tomorrow night passes by.

I walk pass him and bend over to get my clothes. I know he's watching me and I can feel his anger radiating from his being. At that, I smile rather wickedly and look over my shoulder to blow him a kiss. "Thanks for the tasty night, babe.." I say with a grin and resume my way to our bathroom. His cum was oozing from my ass and it was bothering me so much. I hate when men dare cum inside me, but I love the burning sensation it brings. I scream so loud in pleasure and pain at the same time, I just love it.

"Where are you going..?" he asked me as if I was his property.

"I'm going to the bathroom, silly! Where else? I am your roommate.. We share this hotel room so..we share the same bathroom.." I reply back when I stopped just at the foot of the door. I know he wants me so badly, he wants to fuck me until I cry out his name. But, I've never cried out any of the men's name I slept with. No one had the ability to make me cum, unless it's me. I can make myself cum, because I'm fabulous like that.

"..." he stood quiet and I smile at him.

"What's wrong? Is your..beast wanting my tight hole again, deary?" I ask and just for fun, I press my hands against the bathroom door and put out my sexy ass for him. My dick wiggles against my thighs as I spread my legs wide for him. "..Stick it in me, baby.." I pretend to beg and send my gaze at him. I'm loving his dick getting so hard for me and my tight ass, he knows he wants it.

"..." he says nothing in return and simply walks up to me, his dick hard and throbbing.

I feel his hands touch my thighs and my hips. His thick, oozing-with-precum head rubs against my pulsating hole and just thrusts into me as if it didn't hurt me. I let out a gasp and clench my hands against the wooden door. He presses his thighs against my buns and I let out a long moan.

"Aaaahh.. Mmm baby.. Am I tight..?" I ask seductively and slowly wiggle my ass against him.

"Nnn.. You're always tight for me."

"Oooh?" I giggle and grind again him in slowly yet tight circles. "Fuck me.."

And without doubting it twice, he begins to fuck my insides so roughly and I just moan in both pain and pleasure as he hits my prostate over and over. His cock goes all the way inside and pokes the wall that's deep inside me and I just smile and moan and cry out high pitched whines.

He grips my hips tightly and makes our skins clap louder and louder against each other. My dick wiggles back and forth even though it's soft and useless at the moment..

I hear grunts escaping William's throat and I know he's loving my tight entrance. He's loving the tight embrace it's giving to his dick and I feel it throb inside me. Ugh. He's gonna cum inside again...

Just as I feel his dick throb more and more, he stops and takes a full fist of my crimson hair. He tugs my head back harshly and I grunt in pain because of it.

"Ah.. You like that? Huh?" he asks and tugs my hair harder, fucking me so deep and so good that I try to nod but instead I moan an 'Uh huh!' at him... He smiles and keeps his thrusts in a steady yet hard motion. I have nothing else to do but to moan and close my eyes. He did say he was going to fuck me until my body gets numb. And, I simply let him.

Brief moments have passed and he's still fucking me senselessly against the bathroom door. It feels like he's been fucking me for hours but, I don't even know what time it is..

"Aaaah shit!" I moan out and feel his dick throb because of it. He stops for a moment and let's go of my beautiful hair. He wraps an arm around my waist and lifts me while I'm still connected to him. Of course, I only weight a few pounds.

My arms drop down and I breathe out heavily, watching half lidded as he gets me to my hands and knees against our bed and resumes his thrusts. Now that he has a better and more comfortable position, he grips my hips hard again and thrusts me deep until I feel all of his cock inside of me over and over again. Oh it feels so damn good that I keep moaning in sheer pleasure. He's going so deep that my insides throb and hurt, I know I won't be walking well tomorrow. What a shame. I have a fashion show tomorrow night.

I know he isn't going to change positions since his rhythm on his thrusts are getting lazy and sloppy. He's about to cum deep inside me and I can't wait for that burning sensation.

I back my ass up against him and encourage that big dick to cum already. I give it some strong circles and tease it like the mean lady I am and moan out loud as I feel his cum shoot roughly inside of me. Finally! Jeez! His dick throbs and let's out his hot seed inside of me. I grin widely and open my mouth wide to let out soft moans. My body trembles underneath him and my arms give out on me. My cheek plants onto the bed and I feel him exit my throbbing hole.

"Mmn.. You're always so tight for me.." he repeats again to me, giving my ass a hard smack and I respond with a whimpers at the sudden hit.

His cum oozes out from me..again and I just lay there in exhaustion as my body paralyzes completely.

"..Be ready for tomorrow morning.." he warns me, going around the bed and sat beside me. I'm heaving like crazy and my green eyes gaze up at him.

"Because I'll be fucking you senselessly again.. And this time, I'll make you bleed.." he says and lays down, throwing those white sheets over his naked body and leaves me uncovered for the rest of the night. Stupid fucker!

**...xXx...**

7:00 in the morning, the next day.

**...xXx...**

I don't know when, nor I don't know how, but somehow I was tangled within the bed sheets and it covered all of my slender body. I open my eyes and groan tiredly before feeling a sharp pain roll up my back and I shut my eyes tight. This was the first time William had fucked me this hard and fast. My lower back hurts and I still can't feel my legs. Ugh. Fucking idiot.

I feel a warmness move behind me and pulls me tight against it. It's strong arms wrap around my thin waist and I just shut my eyes tight because it fucking hurts like a bitch!

"..Nn.. Will.. Stop it." I groan to him, letting him know that it hurts me. But instead, he tighten the grip around him and I grunt in pain.

"You're mine.." he whispers tiredly into my ear and nibbles it, trying his best to give me a hard-on. Of course, it never works.

Yet, I give him a simple push with my ass and I already feel his dick hard against my ass cheeks. "..Horny..this early, dear?" I ask and pretend to be just as tired as he is. "Let's..just leave it for..tonight.." I tell him in soft groans and try to adjust myself.

He chuckles against my ear and his embrace loosens around me. I feel his hand travel down to my thigh and he lifts it up. My knee hits my head and I gasp because that sharp pain trails up my spine. "Nn.. Will.. Stop it.." I tell him, trying my best to pull his hand off my stretched leg but I fail completely.

"Shh Shh.. I told you last night what was coming your way.." he says in a hush tone. He adjusts the tip of his dick against my pained hole and he teases it! Agh! This moron!

Without any warning at all, he intrudes all the way into me and I gasp deeply. My insides throb in pain and I am so going to kill this..this beast!

"Aaah! D-Don't do it so hard.." I say to him in more of a painful way, feeling his arousal pull slowly from my bruised insides and enters back in just as slowly as it went. I loll my head back and it lands on William's shoulders, my crimson strands brushing my skin softly as he moves in and out of me in a slowly pace.

"..Nnn.. You're so tight.." he whispers in my ear before he licks it and nibbles down on it. He knows I'm hurt now from last night's rough affair, and he's taking it nice and slow, just how I like it.

My moans echo inside our hotel room and it makes him larger and harder inside me. His groans never turn me on, nor he's seen me with a hard-on.. Well, no guy that I've slept with has seen me with one, except one but..he's long lost in my mind.

Though, I only remember a few times where I did get a hard-on besides the first man that ever made love to me. His image is still inside my head but they're faded images. I've always wondered what'd happened to him..

..

I feel his thrusts getting deeper and I moan in both pain and pleasure, curling my fingers tight onto the bed sheets and curling my toes roughly. My eyes are shut tight and my insides clench with each thrust he makes. It pains me but it brings such delicious pleasure. Especially when that cock brushes near my spot and I gasp, giving him the sign that it's right there where he has to keep fucking me.

Though, he still takes it at a slow pace. He never does that! Usually when he finds my spot, he fucks it so hard that I scream my lungs out in sheer pleasure.. But I guess this time it isn't the case.. I like it though, I need him to be slow and gentle with me now that I'm hurt because of him.

He doesn't even bother stroking my dick because it isn't even hard. He knows I don't get turned on easily, so he doesn't bother at all.

His thrusts are nice, deep and slow, making me smile lightly with moans that signify him the pleasure he's giving to me.

"Aahh~ Will.. Cum inside.. Nnn~" I moan and groan to him, feeling his hand tighten around my leg he's currently holding up and tries to get as deep inside of me as possible. He loves how my insides hug him tightly and I love it how deep I will get that cum of his. That sweet, burning sensation has to hurry and plaster inside me. I feel it throb but I know William is teasing me, wanting me to beg like a dog begs for food. But who said I was going to beg?

His slow rhythm soon get sloppy and with only a few thrusts, he releases his seed deep inside me and has me gasping for air. My head that was already lolled back against his shoulder only lolled more onto his shoulder and my back arched, letting out a deep yet loud moan as his liquid travels up my insides. It was brief, yes, but thank god it's over. I'm too exhausted for this crap and I only hope he isn't planning for another round any time today.

"..Ah." he breathes out and releases my leg from the uncomfortable position it was in. I let out a heavy sigh and release the poor bed sheets that were now wrinkled because of me. He's still deep inside me and I'm hoping that he'll exit out slow and gentle.

"You're so sexy, Grell.. Always giving me that tightness of yours.."

"Nnn.." I groan out and my body just goes limb in sheer exhaustion. "..I want to sleep more.." I say softly and tiredly, trying my best to relax my body as I feel my insides throb.

He slowly pulls his soft dick out and I gasp softly at the emptiness, finally being able to relax my lower half. This will pain me soon but, I'll just drown in pills and it'll be over.

I hear shuffling and feel the bed move, then footsteps were almost unauditable but I was able to hear them. I watch William's figure walk to my side of the bed and looks down at me, as if I was another of his trophies. "..You look so sexy after sex...so vulnerable.."

"..Shut up.." I say in return and I huff, closing my eyes again to just cut eye contact with him.

"Hey." his voice turned from a soft one to a very deep one and that made my eyes pop open. "Look at me when I'm speaking to you."

My eyebrows furrow deeply and I struggle to sit onto the bed. Who's he to tell me what to do?

"Excuse me..?" I look at him in a very angered way and I tuck some hair behind my ear. "Who the hell do you think you are?! You aren't my mother!" I comeback at him with angered words and I simply glare at him.

"..." he said nothing in return, and took a seat next to me. I get his anger rising and I wasn't afraid. He knows he can't control me, not even with cold words like his.

Without expecting it, he grabs my throat harshly and squeezes it without mercy. His eyes were like sharp dagger in flames! And even at what he was doing, I wasn't showing any signs of fear.

I merely gasped at his sudden movement and also struggled to bring some air into my beautiful lungs. I know my face is turning different colors because of the lack of oxygen and my hand flies up to grip his. I want him to let go! He'll mark me severely and I have a fashion show tonight!

"...Don't take me for a fool.." he speaks in that cold tone as his features showed no signs of mercy at all.. "You may be my roommate.. But we have done far too much to simply let you walk out on me. I know your secrets, Grell... And if you leave me.. Everyone will know...and they'll take pity on you instead of admiration.." he dared threaten me and now is when my heart starts to race, giving me that harsh pinch on my stomach.

"..W-Will.. Let..go.." I speak out my last breath and my body begins to get limb. My eye sight is slowly blackening and I'm now fearing for my life, my secret...my career!

"...You're pathetic.." he humiliates me and let's go of my throat, gaining nothing but rough coughs and gasps for air from me. My hand lifts up to grab my throat and I keep my gaze down. He's never threatened me like that in the 5 years we've been living together. He can't do this to me, not now..

"..What..What has gotten into you, moron!?" I ask him, gaining an instant sore throat and I close him eyes.

"..." I hear him say nothing in return and I furrow my eyebrows.

"..Will. Respond to me.."

"I have nothing to respond. If you leave, everyone will know! Understood!?"

"..!" my eyes widen at what he said and I gaze up at his angered features. I can feel his anger and frustration radiating from his naked being and I just tighten my hold on my throat. Will he..lay his hand on me like that again..?

"..Okay..just..don't do that again." I say to him and I drop my gaze in sheer sadness.

I know he's looking at me and he feels bad for what he did, because his hand reaches to my chin and lifts it to gaze at him once more.

"All you have to do is to stay by my side. I won't lay a finger on you..as long as you stay.. Understood?"

"..." I give him a single nod and I see his lips curl into a smile. He caresses my cheek and then leans to place a brief kiss on my lips. I return the peck and watch him stand on his feet.

"Keep sleeping. I will order room service in a few hours." he says and walks to our bathroom.

I simply stay there, sitting as the image of him gripping my throat flashes over and over. I graze the warm skin on my neck and I grunt once I feel the actual marks of his fingers on my neck. The skin and inner skin is starting to swell and it's...giving me the actual shape of his hand. That..bastard! Now how am I suppose to hide this for tonight's show!?

I furrow my eyebrows and close my eyes tight, taking my body back down onto the mattress as slowly as I can and release a sigh. Really, what has gotten into him? We aren't dating, we are nothing but roommates. What the hell...

**...xXx...**

"Come on, come on girls! Hurry it up! The show is about to start! Get into your dresses! Chop chop!" shouted my fashion designer to his models, rushing them as quickly as he could. The fashion show demonstrating his new line of dresses was about to start and none of his models were ready, including myself. I saw him sweating thick drops in sheer nervousness, excited yet scared for this fashion show. It's his 6th show but he was still just as nervous as the first time.

Taking place in New York, the streets were filled with cars that beeped loudly in their current traffic. It was passed 7 pm and everyone wanted to return to the comfort of their homes. Wives and children waited for their husbands to return, children waiting for their mothers to pick them up from daycare and men simply wanting to go back home for beer and football. This traffic was daily though, they were use to it yet it was becoming unnecessary. Car accidents were responsible for making such messes as well as re-construction. But tonight was not a night to fret, at least not for the people attending the fashion show nor models that weren't even ready. Aleister Chambers was the fashion designer in charge of his new line of winter dresses and night wear. Tonight, his favorite models will be showing off his line of clothing and he wasn't a very patient man. Especially with models like these, or especially a certain models he admired so much.

"Girls! Come on!"

"Oh relax, darling~ everything will be fine~"

"Ah! Grell my darling! Why aren't you dressed?!" Aleister asks me as he gave me as brief hug.

"Oh honey! I won't be participating on this.. Look at this! There isn't any red dresses!" I complain, giving Aleister a fake yet playful frown before grinning.

I was one of Aleister's favorite models, and the only one with perfect profile and perfect body. My slender hips are perfect as well as my skin tone. Aleister loves it! I could wear any type of color and any type of clothes but, red is my favorite color. Red signifies passion, lust.. Love.. I would do anything to wear any red clothing.

Of course, for having such a perfect body, perfect skin and even having similar characteristics as females, I could really pass as a female at any moment. I participate in shows with women, and they all envy me for being perfection. However, they know nothing of my true gender, they all think I'm female and with a playful charisma.

"Please, Grell! Please wear a different dress!"

"No, dear.. If it ain't red, I ain't wearing it!"

"Aaahhhh!" Aleister whines, falling to his knees and crawled closer to me. "Please, beautiful! I'll do anything!"

"Hmm.. Anything?"

"..." I get no responds from him and I smirk.

"...I'll pay you a brief visit to your office, dear.." I say with my smirk still plastered and I see his expression change.

"So will you do it?"

"Hmmm.. Let me think.." I tease, pretending to think for a moment as I peek down at the man below me.

"FIVE MINUTES, GIRLS! FIVE MINUTES!" shouted a man from outside the door of the fitting room.

"FIVE MINUTES?! OH GRELL PLEASE! PLEASE DO IT FOR DADDY!" he begs more, harder, and even kissed my heels! Oh how I like it when men beg.

"Aleister dear, please don't do that... Fine! I'll do it! But it'll cost you.." I tease him again, bending over teasefully as I help him up.

"Really?! Oh thank goodness!" he sighs in relief, cupping my cheeks before placing a kiss upon my forehead. "You won't regret it."

"..I already am, dear.. So please bring me those dresses.." I say with a sigh, pulling Aleister's hands away from my face and walk to my small fitting space.

I prepare my fitting space as I hear Aleister rushing to bring me those dresses. He brought me three different dresses; a black one with no sleeves, a dark blue one with no sleeves and long elbow lengthened gloves, and a forest green dress with arm lengthened sleeves and a corset.

"Please wear the green first, dear! And please hurry!"

"Yes, yes.. Now go on! They'll waiting for you to present me!" I say, grabbing the dresses from Aleister's hands and close the door on his face.

The host of the show left me with the rest of the female models inside the large fitting room whilst he made his way to the big stage. All New York attended to his fashion show and all the tickets were sold out. This always made Aleister proud of himself and his work, and he couldn't have done it without his main model. Me!

...

With my crimson hair all done, I wore the forest green dress with black heels and an amazing make up. The tight corset that came with the dress redefined my figure and gave me seductive hips that no man could resist. And that was one of my favorite attributes of myself, making men drool for me, fooling them into thinking I was truly a gorgeous female model. It was amusing to see men just drop to their knees and be fed by the palm of my hands.

My eyes shined ever so brightly with the matching make-up that was put on me, making it resemble the same color and patterns that the dress had along the corset and the chest piece. My lime green eyes tended to match with every piece of clothing I wore, and haters were always around the corner to make my life a living hell.

"Hey~ Slutcliff!" one of the models called out to me, her wicked smile plastered upon her face as she placed a hand on her hip. "Flat chested freak! Why do you even bother wearing dresses? You don't even have a chest to show off!"

"Oh Alice, please!" I snap back and snicker, "You truly shouldn't be talking." I respond, giving her a playful glare before my devilish grin emerged. "You're jealous because, I can fit in any size of dress and still look dashing! Not like..you.. Where your breasts block your view of the stage! Why do you think you've fallen in the past shows, Hm? It wasn't your heels.. You simply couldn't see your way because of those melons, darling!" I mock her, sending her a wink before grabbing the earrings that went with my dress. "I don't have time for your silly insults that only make me laugh. You're making yourself look like a useless woman at the moment, so why don't you keep those lips shut before I break them in half.."

"Why you..! How dare you!"

"You started it, honey.." I responded, looking at myself in the mirror as I put on the earrings.

"You.. You slut!" she shouted, grabbing one of the perfume bottle from her counter and threw it towards my head. Of course, missing by an inch. I saw everything through my mirror, and I simply shook my head innerly.

"..You're bad at aiming, dear.. No wonder you're still single.." I say, fixing my fake eyelashes before sighing and turning. "Well.. It is my turn to shine tonight, it's been long.. Why don't you..do a magic trick and make yourself vanish? You aren't needed when I'm here.."

"..!" Alice's eyes widened at my comeback and crossed her arms, "We'll see who shines, bitch.."

"Heh.." I chuckle at her insult, tucking some crimson stands behind my ear before pushing my way passed her and other models who witnessed the argument.

Some admired me for how strong I seem to them and some..just hated my pride...

...

"I wish to thank you all for attending my 6th show here in New York, and for supporting me throughout the years. I know I have taken long in making this show but I know that it was worth the wait.." My dear Aleister spoke loud and clear, showing his pride in his work and his kindness to his audience.

"Tonight, I will show to you this winter's line of fancy clothes, including dresses for special occasions as well as sexy dresses to wear at comfort of your home... I will now present to you, my newly line of clothes.." he says with a sincere smile, giving a brief bow before his audience applauded loudly.

Music began to play and different models came in one by one, showing the new line of beautiful dresses with dark colors. All including royal blue, dark grey, and black. All of the models posed for pictures with serious faces, posing and posing with different methods of showing off those long dresses... Alice Mackenzie presented a black dress that wrapped tight around her thin body, showing off her shape and gentleness. Her dark brown hair was pulled up in a bun and out of her view, pacing her way to the end of the stage and posed beautifully. Everyone clapped loudly for her and loved the dress she was showing off. She felt proud of herself and lifted her chin higher, showing off that pride.

...bitch

...

Up next was me, wearing that forest green dress that wrapped so tightly and beautifully around my body. My hips were well shown and my collar bone showed beautiful, causing everyone to clap more loudly and cheer for me as they admired the contrast of my crimson hair with the forest green dress. My eyes shined brightly and my smile widened, loving how admired I was and how loved I felt.

This was the reason I went into modeling. This was the reason why I wanted this to be my forever career. I feel so loved, so beautiful, something I's never felt throughout my younger years...

...

After showing Aleister's line of clothing, I walked back to my fitting space. In the distance, I take notice of a broad shape near my door and I sigh. His dark hair was unmistakeable as well as his square-shaped glasses. My roommate, Will...

I try my best to ignore his presence while I walk to where I'm suppose to be, passing right by him before I feel a hand grab my arm tightly. He tugs me to him until my body is pressed again his and I simply go with his game.

"Good evening, darling~ Did you come to see my show?" I ask him, giving him one of my insincere smiles.

"You know I always come.." he replies back to me.

"..Then...why are you grabbing me this way. Let go.." I say, trying to pull myself from his grasps before I actually take my arm back. "What has gotten into you, really..? You weren't this way." I say with a sigh and resume my way to my fitting room.

"Leave... The audiences are not allowed back stage.." I say lastly to him and I know he's angry. But who the fuck cares? He fucking hurt me. Me!

Entering my fitting room, I close the door behind me and I press my back against it. Releasing an exhausting sigh. Really...what is with his attitude..? I keep pondering on the same image from this morning, over and over again. I can still feel his hand mark on my neck but I luckily hid it with some make-up. Oh the glory of make-up..it never fails me..

..

With another sigh, I slide my hand up my forehead and walk forward to my space. Slowly removing my earring before taking notice of the big bouquet of roses standing on my desk. My heart skips I don't know how many beats and I just admire that deep red those roses had. Who brought these beauties here? No one is allowed back here- Will..? Did..William bring these to me..? Wait, no. It can be him. He's never bought flowers for me, why would he do it now..? Hmm.. Maybe..My dear Aleister bought them. Oh what a cutie-pie! Hehe~

I walk closer to them and place both of my hands on either side of them. I embrace them and take a deep breath of their unique scent. I smile gently at it and I release a giggle, searching through it for maybe a note..

Ha! And I do find it! I pull out the small card and tear the small envelope open. But first, I read the front of the envelope and it says..."To the most beautiful of all.." Aww! What a charm!

I pull out the card from it's envelope and open it, reading it's brief content and it's signature.

_"Tonight I give to you, what you are. Beautiful roses. Seeing you walk upon that stage tonight was a beautiful blessing yet a dark sin. Your beauty captivates me in so many ways, but I can only be a certain limit away from your being, for I am your secret guardian.. Please forgive me for taking so long in sending flowers to you, since I come to every show you are at... You are a very beautiful woman, with a beautiful smile that I hope to see soon face-to-face..._

_Stay beautiful as always, my dear rose..._

_With love,_

_Your secret admirer."_

Secret admirer...? So...it isn't Aleister after all..

My smile vanishes for a moment and I gaze at the large bouquet before me. Who could this person be..? This is the first time I've received flowers from anyone, why send them now..?

My thoughts get cut short when I hear the door open, seeing the rest of the models come in and shut the door behind them. They all had smiles on their faces, since like me, they too enjoy modeling. It's a very fun experience and you get to witness the latest trends. I take a seat on my part of the fitting room and I gaze at those roses. Still wondering who this person might me... Is it a man..or a woman? And why take so long in sending these? It isn't so hard to just..send them..

"Girls! Oh my god! Guess what?" one of the models within the group spoke loudly, "I am getting married!" she said, now everyone clapping for her an I just sent her a small smile.

"Congrats! When can we attend the wedding?" Alice asks.

"..Ah..well.. It's more of a private ceremony."

"Awww! But why?"

"..He wants to it be just for a few family members and a few close friends.. I'm sorry.."

"Aww. Well, still congrats."

"Thank you.. I'll make sure to bring small somethings for all." she said innocently and I just roll my eyes.

I turn to face the roses again and I smile as I re-read the cute note in my mind over and over. The hand writing does a small click to me but..I can't recall who that is. I've seen it somewhere, but..it's so faded..

..

"GIRLS! My lovely little doves!" Aleister shouted happily as he came inside our fitting room. He clapped loudly and giggled, "I'm so proud of you all!"

"Aww!" the models all squealed at the same time and came forth to hug him. I still sat on my chair as my chin laid upon my palm.

"And to thank you all for such a great job, you'll have a few days to relax."

"Ah! Really?!" a model asked and hugged him tight, as well as the other.

"Yes.. Now run along! The sooner you go, the more relaxing time you'll have.."

At his words, all of the models rushed to get dress and hurried out of the door, leaving me behind with Aleister.

"...You did that on purpose, now did you?" I ask, "because you've never given us 'a few days to relax'.." I stand from my seat and set the note down onto the desk.

I see him smile and come forward to me, "No, dear.. I've mistreated all of you enough with these shows. It's time for some relaxing time."

I place my hands on my hips and gave him the look that tells 'You liar..' "I see.. Well. I was going to stop at your office, you do owe me.."

"Mm. And what is it that you wish?" he asks, slowly snaking his arm around my waist and pulled me close to his body. I see his smile widen and change to a grin since he knows what I want..

"..Yes.. You know, now give it.."

"Oh but.. If I do, it'll cost you."

"Me? But..you know I'll do anything for it.." I say teasefully as I grab his chin gently, "Anything.."

"Heh.. You naughty little robin.."

"Heheh.." I giggle and steal a kiss from his lips, "Now, let's be serious.. Where is it? I've been asking for it for a long while."

"It's in my office, dear.. But first, you must do something for me."

"Hm?..and what is that?"

**...xXx...**

"Mmm.. What a good girl you are.." he breathes out to me as he runs his fingers through my hair.

"Mhm.. Mmm." I respond to him softly as my tongue rolls around the huge head and that long length of his. Aleister and I have had our moments together, and this was always his favorite. We've been this close for a while now and doesn't replace me for another. He knows I'm the only one who can do it this slow and this good.

But as I feel his hands push my head down lower, my hearing caught notice of the door opening. Aleister's office door was opened as a male voice came about.

"Aleister.. Forgive me for interrupt, but-" I hear his heavy footsteps stop as well as his words.

My mouth slides off the bed member and I gaze up from below the table... My eyes widened at the person who came in.

My heart is racing.

My hands are shaking.

This can't be.. Not him.

It's...

"Grell?"

_Well? What did you guys think, hm? Like or no like? Please review! PLEASE!_


	2. Chapter 2

{Forgive me for being so slow at updating.. It's very difficult when you don't own a computer. *sigh* anywho, please enjoy this~}

Undertaker POV

Even after High School, I never lost the deep love I had for him. I was still young back then, but even back then, I knew what I was getting to. My days of loneliness and sorrow had ended and it was all because of him.

I never thought I would have such deep emotion for someone, especially someone who is opposite of me. But I guess destiny is a very mischievous being after all.

..

During our High School days, I was always the 'stay the fuck away from me' person and because of that, I barely had friends. My parents divorced when I was 10 and was currently living with my mother. My father? He'd vanished. I barely cared for my father, he was a very abusive man towards my mother and for that I lost the affection I had for him. If I ever had such emotion for him.

With the small group of friends I had, I was always the dark kid. The kid that only wore black and grey, never going beyond those dark colors. My life signified those colors, because I was always alone after high school hours and even during those hours. Those group of friends I had only needed me for help in their homework, or projects. But since I felt pity for those useless souls, I simply helped just to get them off my back.

My life was a mess, really.

Until I met him.

He changed me completely.

With him, I was able to smile when no one had the ability to. The way our relationship had changed so quickly only made the bond we had created stronger, and for the first time... I was happy.

Grell Sutcliff changed my way of viewing life. He was always happy, with energy and much love to give me. Yes, we became lovers and we lost our purity with each other. That night was the best we ever had. Our love grew stronger after that and I knew I wasn't going to lose him. I gave him my all and he gave me his, the love I had at that time was something so strong that not even I could've handled by myself. I loved him and I was sure he loved me too.

Love...

I never knew of such word in a very deep way like I knew it then. It was all then.. All in the past.

Our strong bond soon perished when he decided to end what he had. A love of 3 years, was ended by the one I thought I would live with forever. And when he did so, his face, his eyes told me another story yet he kept at it, cutting; burning; hurting what was left of my heart.

"I don't love you anymore.. It's over."

"Wait! Grell but why?"

"..."

"I love you. I love you, please..."

"I don't love you anymore, Undertaker. I'm tired of you."

It was all so sudden and to his words, my heart broke deeply in two.

I knew he didn't meant those words, he didn't meant to leave, he didn't wished to leave my side...for I was the only man who had loved him for who he was truly. Who had given everything for his well-being, both at heart and physically.

"...It's over.."

...

He was gone.

Out of my reach.

Out of my league and I knew I had to do something about it.

He never meant those heart-crushing words, nor those features that tried their best to hide the pain underneath his skin...though, his tears deceived him and his hands as well. He shook, he cried right before me and he kept speaking like an answering machine. There was no true emotion in those words, I knew he still loved me and he always will.

...

After High School, I kept track of him like a shadow in the night. He didn't want to leave, I knew he didn't, so I simply kept track of the people he lived with, of the things he would do, of his life completely. And in the process, I paused my life for the sake of his..

Until now.

"...Grell?" it was him. He grew so beautifully like a rose and my heart skipped madly at the sight I was witnessing.

I knew he did these things, I knew most of the men he'd done this and I was shocked when I first found out.. The only one I know personally is William T. Spears, we became friends during our college days and we spoke frequently. He told me all about a new person he'd met, who he said they were annoying yet so beautiful at the same time. In time, I found out it was Grell who he was speaking of and I quickly demanded to see him. I knew I sounded desperate, but it was exactly how I felt.

To that, he took it in a bad way and denied my demand. I told him I was someone special to Grell and ended up speak about him. William changed after I did so and soon we became nothing but strangers again... It was obvious. For as much as he denied himself, he had fallen for Grell's charms just like I did.

"..Is that you?" I have to make sure it's him, but I knew it was I just..

"Undertaker... What.. What are you doing here?" he asks me in a very shocked tone as I watched him rise from underneath Aleister's desk. His mouth is wet with saliva and I can see it drip down his chin and neck, that perfect neck of his.

"I thought..you were dead or something." of course he would think of me as dead. It doesn't surprise me.

"No.. I'm very much alive."

"But..what are you doing here? You aren't into modeling..are you?"

"No. I happen to be the owner of this building." Yes.. After College and after going for the career I wanted, I ended up buying a building here that would relate to modeling. Both professional and for little leagues. I knew Grell would soon perform here, that is why I bought it.

"Hmm.." he hummed and I watch him look at Aleister.

The man stood up with a hand stuffing his pants and planted a kiss upon Grell's mouth. I see Grell's lips move at the same rhythm and with bits of passion in it.

"Go on, I'll meet you soon after work with what I promised.." he tells Grell and I see the redhead nod.

I don't know if I should be brokenhearted or...just feel nothing at all.

Grell's heels clinked as he walked passed me and I can smell the aroma I knew him for. Fresh roses...

I wanted to stop him for a moment, to speak to him finally after so many years.

"..." I knew he was going to say something else, but nothing.. He simply gazed into my forgotten eyes before exiting the office and it was all emptiness once more. He was gone again.

"..What do you want?" I hear Aleister speak and I sigh, turning to face him before tucking some hair behind my ear.

"There's no need to be rude, Aleister."

"I wasn't being rude, I simply asked what do you want.."

"...Well, I came to ask for the payment of this month..and last month...and the other two months previous.."

I knew he would get angry for this, but this is what he gets for renting this building for his stupid modeling shows. It has been months since he'd paid me, and it was time he did.

"You see, Undertaker dearest. Maybe I can pay you..in some other way?"

"Don't even think about it."

"Aww.. But you would enjoy it."

"I said no.."

"...You're so stubborn.. Maybe..I can add my darling Grell to the small event?"

Agh. That bastard. I knew I shouldn't have trusted him. Always having loopholes.

"Leave Grell out of this."

"It seemed like you knew Grell so much right now.. Was he someone special to you?"

He? Aleister knows Grell is male?

"..."

"Ah.. He was, wasn't he? Poor darling you.. Don't worry, I won't add Grell to this. I don't like to share."

I look at him with glaring eyes before shaking my head and turning to leave.

"You have two days to pay me all of those months you owe me.. If you don't pay, you won't be welcomed here any longer."

"Ouch.. Rawr..you're always so mean.. I like my men mean." he purrs to me from afar before giggling like a psycho..

"..Now you have a day with twenty-three hours."

"Hehe.. Alright I get it! Now get out of my office."

"..." and with that, I leave his sex-scented office.

After closing the door to his office, the long horizontal hallway was empty. I was hoping so speak to Grell for at least a while, but now that I saw him...I don't know what to do. It's difficult to ask but, would it be better if I just..move on? After being this deeply in love with him, should we just part ways permanently?.. No.. I can't bring myself to do so. Maybe I'll decide later on.

...I do hope Grell enjoyed the roses I sent him. I know he adores them.

...xXx...

As I make my way to my sports car, a black Mercedes, my eyes were drawn up and caught sight of Grell taking his leave with William. The taller male had an arm around Grell's waist and I watched him push Grell against the concrete wall. Their voices were fainted but I manage to make it out as a small argument. Grell's arms were now pinned to the wall but I couldn't see his face, since William's back was facing me. I placed my car keys onto my pocket and I made my way to them. The closer I got, the less it looked like an argument and the more it looked like a sexual scene. I sigh to myself and clear my throat as I stand directly behind William.

"Forgive the interruption, but..this shouldn't be happening anywhere near my building."

I see Grell's arms being released and William turned to me with a face full of anger. It amused me, really..

"What are you doing here? Stalking Grell again?" he asks me and I chuckle at his ignorance. Really, I thought he was smart.

"Heh.. No.. This happens to be a building I bought a few years ago. And since it has to do with modeling, I suggest you let that model go before I call the cops."

"Don't threaten me.. Who do you think you are?"

"...The owner of this building."

"..Tsk.." he clicked his tongue and let's go of Grell completely. I see him look at Grell in a glaring way and I took his arm, tossing him aside as I too glared at him.

"Get out of my building...before I band your entrance to it."

"..." I watch him sigh and send another look to Grell before leaving out of my building's parking lot.

...

My eyes turn into a more gentle gesture and I look at Grell who is panting for whatever William did. My urges to cup those cheeks were high but I didn't want to make him uncomfortable at all.

"...Stop looking at me."

"..Why?"

"Just stop it." he demanded in a soft voice before adjusting the dress he had on... Dress or no dress, male clothes or no male clothes...I still love Grell for who he was, no matter what he wore. But it seemed like he was beginning to feel uncomfortable by the way his body was tensing.

"...I've miss-"

"No. Don't say it. Just leave."

"Grell.. Listen."

"I don't want to listen."

"Please.. Look at me.. Look at me and tell me you still don't love me."

"..." his silence was more sincere than his own words and I knew for a fact that he still had me hidden within his heart.

"Why are you here? Why are you appearing in my life again? I...strictly told you...that I didn't want to see you again.. To get out of my life."

"It isn't easy to forget a first love, and you know that."

"We were young! Why does it even matter to you?"

"You were the first person I ever smiled to, the person I ever showed my true feelings... The one I made love to for the first time."

"Shut up.. Stop.. I..don't care!"

"Yes you do.. I was your first, you told me so."

"No... I...I was lying."

"No you were not. Stop denying it, Grell.." I can't believe he was saying all of these things, as if I never mattered to him. His eyes never met mine as I spoke to him, he simply gazed down at my black boots. I watched his eyes slowly swell and turn a reddened color, that made my heart shrink deep into my chest and my urges to cup his cheek went over my limit.

I slowly brought my hand to his cheek and lifted his saddened gaze filled with tears so he would look at me. Those tears damped my hand and I look as he leans to my touch.

"...Undertaker.."

"Where have you been all this time, my dear..?" I ask him and slowly took a few steps closer to him. "I haven't stop thinking about you all this time. I miss you."

"We were young, Undertaker.. How can you still live in the past?"

"...It isn't that I'm leaving in the past.. You were my very first love, the only one who really made me happy.. And you suddenly ended it like it didn't matter."

"It..did matter but...please just..forget about it already."

My eyes widen at his words and both of my hands cupped his face and made him look straight at me. I know he looked into the sadness my eyes reflected, how brokenhearted those words make me feel.

"How am I suppose to forget about it, Grell? You wish for me to forget everything we've done? Our first time?" I ask in a rather saddened and desperate way before slowly drifting my hands off his cheeks.

"..." he says nothing and stares at me with a saddened look as well.

To all of this, I simply sigh and reach down to my pocket. I pull out my business card and handed it to him. "Here.. Call me if you need anything." I say to him in a saddened tone and I turn to walk towards my car again. But before doing so, I glance over my shoulder for a brief glance at Grell before saying, "..I hope you liked the roses I sent you. They are just as beautiful as you."

I watch his eyes widen and I nod, taking my leave as well and this time...maybe it is for the best.. Maybe he did forget..maybe not. But whatever it was, it broke my heart more than ever before.

...xXx...

Tossing my keys onto my bed, I release an exhausted sigh before removing my black cloak. I wear simple things like, a buttoned up grey shirt with black jeans. Of course, my black boots don't stay behind..

My home is rather big for me and at times, I feel much more lonelier than my next door neighbor. Now that's a very lonely man... My home reflects most of my interests, including my admiration for dark, goth accessories and decorations. Even during a bright, sunny day, my home's interior dims the sun's light and it makes it look like it's always night. But I enjoy it that way. My eyes are sensitive to the light, anyway..

There are some things Grell doesn't know about me after he ended our relationship. After it all, I ended up getting a rather large tattoo on my back and travels down my arms like vines, stopping right before curling around my middle finger. This tattoo represents the binds that'd held me back ever since I was young, and it's a constant reminder that it'll bind me for eternity.. Grell once told me that he despised tattoos but...maybe he'll like this one if he ever comes back.. If he is coming back..

Running my fingers through my strands, I gaze up at the miniature-sized father clock on top of my drawer. 9:00 p.m. Too early to sleep, too early to be home all alone. What now? After speaking so briefly, so achingly with Grell, what am I suppose to do now with this deep love my heart dwells inside? Shouldn't I hold it still? Or release it into the dark abyss that it is my mind?

...

Grell's POV

My heart couldn't have ached more like it did now. It couldn't have raced like it was doing now nor breaking even more than before. What have I done? What is this chaos I've brought myself into? The love I once had for him, is this what it all means? This feeling, this urge to stop him and speak the truth wants to devour me but my body doesn't move at all and I watch him leave my side once more. I see him vanish farther and farther until his car roars away from my sight and I stand in this cold parking lot. My hand clenches the small business card he gave me and I sigh heavily. What...have I done? I know he didn't deserve such cruel words but I had no choice but to push him away. Push away the only man who's loved me with all his being, with all his heart and soul, and...what have I done? Have I sunk him deeper into the same dark abyss I once found him in? What...the hell is wrong with me?

Ring~... Ring~...Rin-~

"Yes?!" I shout at the person on the other line and I hear them hum into their phone. My hands start to shake and my eyes begin to drown in warm tears. "What..do you want?"

"I'm waiting in the car, hurry up." I hear William's voice and I sigh, nodding my head as I grip my phone.

"Yes.. I.. I'll be there."

"What's wrong? Are you crying?" he asks me as if he knew me so well, and he does. He knows me like the back of his hand and I shake my head.

"N-No.. Well, yes but.. It's nothing."

"...very well. Hurry, I'll buy some dinner on our way home." he says before hanging up. This is the side of him I like to see, to be around with. His other side scares me so badly that I shake whenever he isn't present. But this gentle side, is what I need now.

...

My heart doesn't stop racing. He found me again, and...he couldn't be much handsome than before. Is this destiny playing games with me? Or does it really care for me so much that, it brought him back into my life?... This is too much to handle at the moment. I'm exhausted, hungry, and I just want to rest until tomorrow evening.

"Grell!"

I hear Aleister's voice call to me and I lift my saddened and drowned-with-tears eyes up to him as he approaches me with what I wanted. His stops in mid step as he watches how my faces stains with hurtful tears that won't stop falling.

"Grell darling.." he calls to me in the softest voice I've heard and I can't help but let out all my emotions to him. My hands start to clench and I toss my phone onto the concrete floor, shattering it into pieces as I take a deep breath and...

"AAAAHHHHH!" I scream my lungs out and my body shakes more in anger, in sadness and loneliness. I feel arms wrap around me tightly and holding me so tight that I give in to the embrace. My own arms wrap around Aleister's waist and tighten them as I cry onto his chest.

"Oh darling.. What's wrong? I haven't seen you cry this much."

I hear him speak but it's all muffles to me. I just want to go home, to my bed and forget about this day. Everything.

"Grell.. Look at me, darling." he calls out to me and I feel his embrace loosening up. His hands had drifted to my moist face and lifted my swollen gaze up. "Stop crying, dear.. It'll be fine."

I couldn't help but to release a whimper and I close my eyes, feeling his thumbs brushing along my features to wipe my tears away.

"Are you going home alone? Or is someone-"

"..W-Will is waiting..for me."

"Then come, I'll take you to him." he says as he places a kiss upon my forehead. He then let's go of me and wraps me in what I wanted, a red fur coat he owed me for some time. It came in handy now that it was so cold, and my body was freezing cold without me registering it.

I snuggle into the coat tightly and feel his arm wrap around my waist, leading me out of the parking lot and into the driveway towards the exit. William waited for me in his car as we got closer and Aleister opened the door for me.

"Watch your head, love.." Aleister said to me and I take a seat, watching as Aleister closed the door and I look at William for a brief moment.

"What happened? Did he do something to you?" he asks me in a cold yet concerning voice. I simply shake my head and snuggle more into the coat. I feel his warm hand caress my cheek and I lean against it, "Let's go home.."

...xXx...

Once we arrived home, William unlocked the door to our hotel room as he held tonight's dinner. I simply followed him inside as I still hid my thin body within the fur coat. My eyes still didn't stop their tear-shedding and I sniffled lightly, "Will.." I call my roommate and receive a hum from him. "I..will take a shower first, alright?" I say as I make my way to the bathroom, hearing his footsteps coming closer to me and stopped me in a rather gentle way.

His arms wrapped around my waist and I sigh at the gentle embrace he gave me from behind. This is sort-of new to me, but I'll accept it either way. His cheek pressed against mine and I close my eyes, quickly releasing another tear as I start to sob for the first time in months.

"Grell.. Cease your crying." I hear him whisper into my ear and his embrace tightened, "It'll be alright.. You won't see him again."

"It..isn't about seeing him..again." I reply in a choked out voice and drift my hand up to wipe my tears. "It's that...I already saw him. And his image won't vanish from my mind and..my heart aches badly. He came back into my life just to ruin it.."

"Then we'll move.. We'll leave far away.."

"Wh..What?.. I..I can't. My career is here..I can't leave Aleister and modeling behind."

"We'll start all over.."

"No, Will...please understand."

"Then why are you crying your eyes out? Huh? For him? I'm giving you suggestions here, options for us to leave. And still wish to stay?"

"..."

"Honestly.." he finishes off and let's go of me completely. His words couldn't have hurt more but it did. He was right. He was always right... Maybe..it's best to leave and vanish once more.

...

Finishing off with my shower, I exit the bathroom with a red robe on and my hair tangled within a towel. My eyes ceased their crying and William soon relaxed after I've gotten him annoyed. I always have a way to annoy him, but even I don't know how. Maybe he simply gets annoyed easily...

My eyes aren't as swollen as before but they're still swollen enough to tell that I cried. And William noticed right away. He was sitting on our bed, his back pressed against the bed board as he read one of his million books. He has a tendency of reading books he'd already read, I don't know how. But for me, it's boring to read a book more than once... I see him look up from his book and closes it, easing from the bed as he walked to me and stood in front of me. His eyes pierced deep inside mine like daggers and I couldn't help but to cut the eye contact as I look down. I watch his hands from the corner of my eyes as they're raised and placed upon my cheeks.

"No.." I quickly respond to his touch and pull my face from them. "I don't want you to see me this way."

"Nonsense.." he stated simply and went on to lift my gaze.

I soon gaze at those unique eyes of his and I can't help but let some tears drown my eyes again. "I just...want to forget."

"..." having no response from him, I close my eyes and soon feel his lips laced with mine. My own moved in sync with his and soon, my body was pressed against his in search of warmth. I feel so cold, freezing, as if all the windows were open and the winter breeze pierce my skin.. I know he feels my freezing body temperature, because his hands soon move from my cheeks to my neck and down to my waist just to pull me even more closer to him.

This is a William I haven't witnessed at all. So gentle, so loving, so caring.. I almost can't recognize him at all.

"Mmm.. Will.." I groan into our kiss and soon part from it, my lungs begging for air as I stare up at him.. I wish to forget. To forget that face I'd forgotten with the years. I want my mind to be blank, to be clouded by nothingness.

"Come.." he began as I gaze up at him. "Dinner will get cold."

"No I.. I'm not hungry."

"You must eat. You haven't since this morning."

"...No.."

"Grell." William spoke my name and he cupped my cheek again, "Eat something, then you can throw it up again."

"..."

"Come.." he took my hand in his and pulled me to our small table near the window and sat me down. He served me a small amount of food and I watch him serve himself, pouring some wine in elegant glasses as he too lit up a candle.

I remained quiet through out his motion, not wanting to go against him for now since I'm too exhausted to even argue over silly things. My body chills more now that we're close to the window and my lips tremble slightly. "W..Will.. Why is it so cold in here?"

"What are you speaking of? It's 75 degrees in here.."

"Ugh.. It's so cold.."

"...I'll raise the temperature for now." he replied and walked away from our table. He went to the thermostat next to the door to our room and raised the temperature to I don't know what, returning to our table once more as he sat in front of me.

I watch him eat his food and I look at mine with slight disgust. My stomach turns and swirls and I quickly brought my hand to cover my mouth. "I can't.." I muffle into my hand and I look at William. "I can't eat that.. It smells disgusting.."

"You must..eat something." he said with his mouth slightly full as he took a sip from his wine. "At least take a few bites."

"It's disgusting.." I say and sat back into my chair more, wanting to be away from the food as much as possible.

"..You need to get more tests, this isn't normal."

"I know what have, I don't need to go to anymore doctors."

"You also need your therapy."

"I said no.." I stubbornly reply and stood up from my chair. I turn to face the bed and walk towards it before being stopped by arms wrapped around me. My heart skips a beat and I sigh, "Will.. I'm not feeling too well.."

"Is it because of him?"

"..."

"You are upset that he's back, right?"

"..Yes.. I just want to forget.."

"And how would you do that?

"...Make love to me, Will.." I say tiredly as I suddenly feel hot and my cheeks flushed madly.

My request is soon responded by a steaming kiss as well as small kisses being drifted down to my cold neck. He presses his cheek against mine and I close my eyes, "You're freezing cold.." he whispers into my ear and I nod in response.

"Warm me up, Will. I'm so cold.." I request as well and in his response, he swooped me off my feet and carried me to our bed. This is..sort-of romantic. I haven't had this done in so long, only with... Shit.. Stop thinking of him already. I won't be seeing him again, so get him out of your head!

...

But, there's always a reason why I keep thinking of him. And my heart aches with each thought, each memory that I want to erase, to fucking forget!

"Grell.." he whispers my name and I look at him as he places me upon our bed. My eyes grow soft as he soon hovers above me and slowly removes the tie to my robe. He spreads the robe apart and exposes my cold body to even more cold, and I shiver in sort-of delight as I gaze up at him. His hands start to roam my fragile being and I close my eyes, arching my head back just a bit as I groan a little. "Nn.. So gentle.." I mumbled softly and I soon open my eyes to meet his close gaze as he laced our lips together in the most gentle kiss I've had in years. His lips soon travel down my freezing body and I whimper softly, wanting to be filled and not feel empty like I was feeling. "Hurry.." I rush him in a purr and I watch him remove his clothing. I admire his built body and I spread my legs wide as my arms swung over my head.

"You want me this badly?" he asks me and I nod, assuring him that I want all of him. For him to make me forget about tonight's event and everything else.

"Hurry.. Please hurry.." I beg for the first time and my features soon heat up with a blush. Damn it.. I never beg..and Undertaker had to appear and make my life another living hell!

My legs are spread even more and he lifted them over his shoulders. Without preparing me, nor teasing my pulsating hole, he adjusts himself and pushes all of him inside me. My eyes shut tight and I released a loud moan of sheer pain. My hands clenched the bedsheets and tears drowned my eyes again, "Aaaooww.. Will.. Hah.." I breathe out and whimper more. "Ah..m..make me..forget. Make love to me..Mmm"

"Mmm.. You're so tight." he comments and starts to move slow. His eyes were shutting tight and I heard him groan in more of pain than pleasure. I then feel him pull his member off me and I open my eyes a little wide.

"Will.."

"Wait.." he tells me and I watching him reach for the drawer. He pulls some lube from it and pours some in his hand. "This will make our lives easier." he says and I can't help but smile a little. I watch him rub the lube on his hardness and I bite my lower lip.

"It's so big.." I say and I gaze at him as he smirks at me.

"It's big?"

"Mhmm.. I like it." I say with a lick made to my lips. My eyes roam his body once more and I bring myself in a sitting position. My eyes dart to that large length of his and I get to my knees, my hand reaching for that lubed cock as I grasp it within my hand. "Mmm baby.." I moan and bring my eyes up to look at him.

"Suck it.." he demands and I oblige like the slut I am.

My tongue swipes along my upper lip and I lean down, giving that hard head a lick before taking it all in my mouth. I feel his body rise from his position as well as both of his hands on my hair. My head bobs up and down his largeness and I moan purposely just to send pleasurable vibrations. My tongue rolls around his tasty cock and I taste his precum all over my tongue. I moan in delight because it tastes so good and I can't help but swallow.

"Nngh.."

"Mmmm~" I hear him moan and I do so as well, sucking harder as I focus on the head only. I bob my head more and more and I soon feel his hips move, thrusting into my mouth like he likes it.

"Mmm let me fuck that mouth." he says to me in heavy breaths and he grips my hair, pushing my head more into his bucking hips as my gag reflex responses to the abuse William is giving it. My eyes water with each thrust and I feel his cock throb inside my throat. He's going to cum and I can't wait until-

"Nnnnaahhh..! Fuck..hah.." he releases his juicy seed down my throat and my eyes widen.

"MmmmMmmMmm! Ahh..." he releases my head and I pull myself back, my lips coated with cum and saliva as I slowly swallow what's left of his seed.

Without any words he pushes me back down and returns to me, pulling my legs over his shoulders once more. I prepare for his entrance as my back arches and I whimper at the largeness that just entered all the way inside of me. It slid with ease so pain never came to me. This was my release, my addiction.. This is the only way Undertaker can stay away from my mind at least for a moment.

..

William moved slowly within me and grind very close to me, letting whimpers escape my throat as my hands clench the bed sheets more and more. It feels so good to be full, to satisfy my body when it wish what it wants. But even being taken by William still doesn't take my thoughts of Undertaker away. Actually, the more William thrusts into me, the more it reminds me of Undertaker and the night of our first time...

Undertaker made love to me, so gently, so caring and loving.. Though it was painful at first, he soon brought sheer pleasure to my body and I shuddered underneath him. Oh how I missed him when I ended our love. I missed him so much, that I cried for nights after nights after nights.. And even then, I cried more. I missed his embrace, his touch, his gentle words and the way he made love to me..

I missed it all and by doing this with William, it isn't helping me at all.

Yet, I don't stop him. I let William make sweet love to me as I listen to my own moans and his heavy breaths. My forehead is already growing sweaty and I open my eyes to gaze at one soaked-in-sweat William. We haven't even started the rough part and he was already sweating. But, oh well..

"Shit..Nnrrgh." he mumbled and growled softly as he kept his slow thrusts.

I feel myself tightening and I know he likes it when I do so. His own member grows larger inside me and I just loll my head back as I open my mouth wide in a gasp. It feels so damn good that I try to move my hips in the uncomfortable position he has me on and soon let's go of my legs. I then wrapped my legs around his waist and pull him closer to me. "Mmm Will.. You're so big...and hard, baby.." I moan to him and I watch his hand lift to cup my face gently. My hips then move in slow, circular motions and I start to hear him emit soft groans through his nose.

"You like that, Hm?" he asks me and I respond with a 'Uh huh' in a whimpered manner. I watch him grab my hips and pulling me up to a more sitting position. Our chests are pressed together as his hands held my back ever so gently. His eyes looked deep into my watered ones and he leans up, lacing our lips together in the most deep, gentle kiss I've had in so long.. We moved in sync, creating soft suckling noises until our tongues met in a fantastic dance of waltz. My hips move in slow, bouncing circles as our tongues keep at their dancing. William had never tasted so good like he did now, and I feel myself melt in his arms for just a moment as he soon parts from our kiss and stares up at me.

"You're mine.." he claims and I watch him lean towards my chest and kiss up until he was so close to my neck. I feel a suckling sensation and I smile gently as my hands tangle within his black hair, encouraging him to mark me as much as he wants.

"Mmm.. So good." I breathe out as I continue my motion, feeling his hardness throb deep inside me and I slowly increase the speed.. His breaths become heavy once more and I hear more groans emit from his throat. He feels my insides throb and tighten and that makes his eyes shut tight as I watch all over him.

"Mmmbaby.. You want..to cum?" I ask him in small pauses as my breath soon increases.

"...shit.." he curses under his breath and I can't help but smile. "..fuck..I..I'm cumming..!"

"Ah.. Hahfuck..fuck deep inside me. Mmm fuck me deep and cum inside.." I can't take it anymore. Increase the speed, fuck me hard, make me scream and forget about this night. Fuck making love! What was I thinking? It only reminds me of him and that's the last thing I want to do..

"..fuck you're so tight.." he breathes out to me and I watch him lay down onto the bed as I hover over him. The speed soon increases more and more and he grips my ass tight in his hands, holding them there as his hips buck up harshly and thrusts so hard and good into me. I throw my head back and my hands clench the bed sheet next to his head. My body asks for more but this is too good to even change anything. Fuck.. He knows how to make me feel good.

"..shit..shit..fuck!" he groans deeply and makes my body rise, making me ride his large length and I scream in sheer delight.

I know he's holding it in, and I want him to cum now. To make that burning sensation travel up inside me and scar me for life. I want him to be a brute, to fuck me so hard that I'll bleed and still be fucked until morning. Oh fuck.. It's so fucking good!

"Mmmaahh! Will!.. Will! Cum inside! Aahh fuck! Cum inside!"

"Hah..but it's so good."

"Cum inside! Haah Aahh! Shit! Hurry!" I rush him and I start to move my hips in deep circles, biting down onto my lower lip as our skin soon clap with each thrust.

The claps echo around our room and our moans do so as well, making his cock throb inside me and soon release his seed so deep inside me. My mouth opened wide in a gasp and I shrieked, planting my hands on my hair as I clench my own strands with force. I can feel his cum shoot up inside me and burn me so good that tears fall down my eyes. My body becomes weak and wobbly, making me sigh after it all and fall back onto the bed. My breaths are heavy and small grunts escape my throat, feeling his cum ooze out of me and onto our bed while he was still connected.

My eyes stay open and become redder, more tears filling them and releasing them. I began to cry right in front of William and I brought my hands up to my face.

My life is a mess.

My way of living isn't the best but, Undertaker made it worse by appearing in it again. Why didn't he stay away? Why did he had to come back and bring these...painful memories I so want to erase?

Ugh..

Fuck..

{I hope you all enjoyed this~ Please do review! ^/^}


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